The Worst House in the Street

I was looking at a house the other day that was in a location I’d never really paid much attention to before. 

Driving up the main street of the area has never filled me with much confidence, but once you get into the back streets the neighbourhood actually looks kind of nice.  And it’s about 1km from the River (nice) and about 1km from a botanical garden (nice) and close to shops (nice) and close to take-away food outlets (nice) and walking distance from the club I sometimes go to for dinner (nice) which has a lawn bowls club attached to it (noice)…

So, in other words, I really like the place.  I particularly liked the fact that it honestly looks like it would be easier for me to run to work from there than drive.  There’s a rather conveniently located footbridge which makes getting to work on foot about a 4km trip, while driving would be closer to 10km.

The house looks kind of nice, from the agency photos, and the outside doesn’t look bad, in passing.

And it’s in my price range, and it’s had new paintwork and carpets done “recently” (whatever that means, in real estate parlance), so I probably wouldn’t have to fix it up at all.

There’s only one problem:  The house right next door.

I think it’s a good sign when the house you are looking at is the worst house on the street.  Once it’s yours, you can do something about it.  You can make it the best house on the street.

However, if the house next-door or across the road is the worst house on the street, there’s nothing you can do about that – it’s practically part of your house, and you’re stuck with it.

I don’t know who lives there.  I’ve not seen them, and the yard doesn’t show any signs of couches or car parts on the lawn (it also doesn’t show any signs of watering, but that’s beside the point), and maybe they’re perfectly nice neighbours…

But they are the kind of people who don’t believe in nice curtains.  Standing in front of the house I noticed a tatty rag in one window, broken blinds at two others and part of a cardboard box acting as a sun-block for a fourth.

So the house needs a paint job and the yard needs a good water.  These things in themselves and on their own are not indicative of poor quality people.  A lack of decent window dressings, on the other hand, makes me instinctively distrust them.

Nice people have nice curtains.  They may not be expensive ones, they may not be backed or anything fancy – but they are intact and they look like they are meant to be in the window.

Do you know who has cardboard boxes and rags in their windows?  Unpleasant people.  That’s who.  The kind of people who don’t care if their kids our out doing unpleasant things like graffitiing the neighbourhood and doing burn-outs in cars of dubious road-worthiness.  The kinds of people who play unpleasant music at unpleasant volumes.  The kinds of people who have unpleasant conversations in unpleasant tones of voice that cannot be tuned out.

It’s the worst house on the street, and my inner snob is sure it must play home to the worst neighbours in the area.

The house on the other side looks nice at first glance, but it has besser blocks scattered around its garden at random intervals.  They aren’t even set upright so they look like they’re meant to be decorative.  What’s with that?

I don’t know if I’m going to go to the open house on the weekend.