A very close friend

My dog died.

She was 15 years old (which is really good innings for a dog her size), and had been getting quite frail and stiff in her old age.  She'd been struggling with the stairs for some time, and we were wondering what we would do when she was finally too frail to make it up (or down).

We've really been expecting her to fall down the stairs and do some serious damage for quite some time.  Last Thursday, she finally did.

She fell down the stairs and broke her hip.  At her age, and with her pre-existing hip troubles (and some dementia), we realised she was not going to recover from this injury with any quality of life, so we had her put down.  It's a kindness we're not allowed to give ourselves, but we can still grant the animals we love a soft death.

As it was, she had a pretty good week.  Right up to the pain and blood and everything.

I've been thinking about this thing we do, with pets.  We know an animal is only going to live for a fraction of our lives. When we bring a dog or cat into our lives, we know that they are only going to be with us for 15-20 years.

We bring something into our homes.  We forge a relationship with them that sits somewhere between "very good friend" and "member of the family" - and we let them live with us just long enough to make sure that their passing is devastating.

I say "my dog died" - but it would be far more accurate to say I lost a very close friend last week.  I feel the same kind of loss and pain I would feel if my best friend - whom I see every day - died.

Because that's exactly what happened.  She was my best friend.

And my flatmate.

And a member of the family.

But, when I say "my dog died", it doesn't really embody all of these things.

She died the day before I took a test.  She died two days before I was booked to leave town for the weekend.

I went ahead with all of these things because I was keeping myself distracted - but I found myself wondering what I would say if I had to cancel anything.

"My dog died?"

It's odd how anyone who has ever owned a pet should understand how significant that is, but no one actually does.  Pets die all the time, don't they?

No, I think I'd go with the greater truth:  "I lost a very close friend."