Handle-bar moustache

Here at the university, we have a few men adorning their faces with natural fuzz for Movember - a rather peculiar charity concept in which men grow moustaches for sponsorship dollars in order to support mens' health issues, particularly depression.

As someone who has always felt that modern men are boring and need to do more entertaining things with their facial hair, I thoroughly encourage this bizarre event on principle...

However, I've been seeing a number guys wandering around the place wearing singlets and handle-bar moustaches. Now, in North Queensland it is quite common to see people who believe an athletic singlet is perfectly acceptable outerwear. There is nothing at all unusual about that. But team it with a handle-bar moustache and it just looks weird.

Not a "hey, that's kind of unusual" weird, either. More of a "that guy looks like some sort of creep" weird.

I'd never really thought about it before, but apparently on a certain, unconscious level there is an understanding that men who have particular patterns of facial hair also need to dress appropriately. A handle-bar moustache requires an actual shirt. Something that adequately covers arms and torso and bears no resemblance to underwear.

So does a set of really fuzzy mutton chops. There's one guy who comes in on the weekends occasionally who has the fuzziest face you've seen outside of an actual beard who often turns up dressed in nothing but a singlet and a pair of shorts. He just looks wrong, somehow. He's not dressed any differently from a lot of our other "guests", and yet it seems like he's only half-dressed... and inexplicably unkempt.

Side burns and a soul patch could probably work with a singlet without creepiness, but I think singlet wearers should probably remain clean-shaven (or with a designer stubble, if they've got the figure to pull it off).